Guest Post: Thank God for Humor by Davis Aujourd’hui

Here’s the second of the two-part series on writing humor by author Davis Aujourd’hui. If you missed Monday’s post, find it here. Enjoy – and thanks again Davis for your insights and experiences!

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Thank God for Humor!

Part One:
Where would we be if we couldn’t laugh in this world that is frequently too serious for its own good? One of the greatest gifts I’ve come to discover is how to laugh at and with myself. I’ve spent most of my life taking myself and things way too seriously. It’s wonderful to have a sensitive heart, but it’s so important to shield it from unnecessary pain. That’s where a good dose of humor serves the spirit and leads us all to let go through wonderfully releasing belly laughs. One thing is certain. Humor not only helps us, it heals.

I’ve heard it said that children laugh hundreds of time each day. On the other hand, adults only laugh six times a day on average. If you’ve been like I’ve been, I bet there have been many days within your lives when you didn’t laugh at all. Now, that’s no laughing matter!

What’s been wonderfully healing for me has been to turn my past pain into humor. That’s first required doing some work at letting go. That’s meant that I’ve had to deal with resentments and practice forgiveness of myself and others. That’s not an easy job; but, trust me, it’s worth the effort!

By facing myself and my own foibles, and learning not to take myself so seriously, I’ve learned how to laugh at and with myself over things that I didn’t used to find funny at all. This has brought me so much joy and it’s released me from toxic things like self-pity. Life’s too short to stay locked in a cave of negativity and judgment.

Well, my friends. You certainly know that I’ve been able to use humor in my series of Sister Mary Olga books. I’ve especially done that by looking at character flaws that I’ve observed in both myself and others. Then I’ve exaggerated them for comic effect. Consider the prudish and judgmental Priscilla Bunhead and the proud and manipulative Lula Mae Bunsaplenty. Add an angry bully named Martha Mayhem who has a chip on her shoulder bigger than a dowager’s hump. With them I’ve created a recipe for finding humor in the darkness within people’s souls.

In my own life, I think back to how I used to laugh so many times – so freely and unselfconsciously. What a relief it was! Guess what, folks? Those days have returned for me and they can for you too. Just lighten up and let go of whatever has bothered you. Face your fears and see them for what they are. Surrender them to the light and let go of the darkness within your souls. If I’ve been able to do it, anybody can!

Part Two:
Well, you already know what used to be some of my deepest and darkest secrets. By sharing them with you, I am letting go of my shame. They also can’t be used as weapons against me since I’ve already put them out there. That’s putting my secrets into the light. Now, the question is, “How did I manage to find a way to lighten up myself?”

That’s a good question! I’ve already talked about taking a self-inventory. That’s the fourth step in a twelve-step program – “We took a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.” Once I was able to look at my flaws and my assets of character, I was able to appreciate that I have been simply human. What I now need to do is to be responsible for my life. My number one responsibility is for maintaining my own personal happiness. No one or nothing can do that for me except myself. The same is true for any of us.

What’s helped me has been to talk to another human being with whom I can trust my conflicts. If they can relate, they can help me put things into perspective. Before long, I feel lighter. Then I’m able to look at something like the fight I may have had with my partner and realize how ridiculous my part in it had been. I had been only getting hung up in my own shit again. Talk about insanity!

Think about all of those times when you were convinced that you were right about something. Just remember, depending on who else was involved, there are always that many different perspectives of a given situation. Isn’t it more freeing to leave everyone to their own opinions and not always need to be right? That’s a form of letting go. It’s also a spiritual principle that will help you maintain your joy.

How about looking back upon those occasions when you developed a resentment and look at your part in it. Did you feel like a victim and then become angry and self-righteous? God knows how many times I have done that in my past!

As I’ve said in “I am my characters,” my characters are based upon those aspects of light and darkness within myself and what I’ve observed within others. The problem is that, when I focus on other people’s shortcomings, I am making a negative judgment. As I’ve said before, I am also looking at something with which I need to look at within myself.

As I’ve created my characters and their exaggerated character defects, I am hoping that you will begin to see where you have possessed some of these same attributes yourself. If you can laugh at my characters’ antics, you should have the capacity to laugh at your own. That will be your pathway to freedom. It will be your pathway back to your joy.

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Davis Aujourd’hui is the author of the Sister Mary Olga Fortitude series of hilarious satires. The first book is entitled The Misadventures of Sister Mary Olga Fortitude.  It was followed byBabes in Bucksnort.  Davis possesses a rich life experience that has enabled him to draw from it in order to create a colorful canvas upon which to paint very human lives. He is a retired social worker, having worked for Adult Protective Services in New York State for nearly twenty years. He developed the characters within his series of books in order to entertain a colleague by using the gift of humor.  As will be the case with Sister Mary Olga in his third book, he is a recovering alcoholic. He also happens to be gay as are several of the endearing and humorous characters within his novels. He can speak from his own experience. He has possessed all of the foibles of his cast of characters who are naughty, nasty, and nice.  Davis lives in Upstate New York where he is currently sharing his life with his partner of seven years. He is socially-minded and spirituality is the most important ingredient in order for him to maintain a happy and successful life. For more information, visit his blog.